Monday, May 24, 2010

Play Therapy

I'm sorry but I'm not in the best frame of mind. I've been having nightmares about losing our home and so has my daughter. She overhears things and she worries.

This is what I saw in her room yesterday.

My daughter's dollhouse

What is unusual about this house? (besides the cats?)

I noticed that almost all of the furniture is gone. I asked Crystal where the furniture went. She said that the family had to leave their house. I asked why they didn't take everything with them. She said that their new house was smaller and not everything fit in it. I asked about the cats. She explained that they are separate families. There are the two domestic cats in the attic who are soon to be married, a mama lion and her cub and a cheetah family (they have three cubs but one is missing.) These three families are all interested in buying the house. Okay, mystery solved!

The disturbing thing about this picture (besides the fact that my daughter doesn't play with human families), is that Crystal is playing about a family losing their home! What child does this?

I found most of the missing furniture in "storage"

She's nine years old. She is anxious that we will lose our home. She prays for it every night. She had a nightmare that we lost our house and, worse, our pets. She even told her doctor about her fears.

I try to shelter her from the possibilities but I can't tell my daughter that these things aren't real when they are.

This is what I came home to last week.
My front door

These are notices that our house will be auctioned to the highest bidder next month. I knew these notices were coming but nothing could prepare me for the actual sight of them. It's a living nightmare. I have a hard time even looking at this picture. I ripped the papers off immediately. Then I taped them back up and took a photo. I want people to see my horror. I also want to show people not to believe their eyes. I don't care what these notices say, I still believe in my heart that my husband and I will grow old in this house! I have a friend who was given months to live (six years ago!). Don't believe everything you hear, read or see!!!

But this doesn't mean you don't have to deal with it. I do have a contact at the bank. I will call her, Horton, based on my previous post (Horton Hears a Who). I keep detailed notes on all our conversations. She is helping me but things are taking a long time to happen. They are taking longer than even she thinks they will take.

It's hard on me. I'm not really built to deal well with this kind of stress. It's hard for me to wait. I do better with actual events than I do with waiting for something to happen. Recently our dogs cornered a jackrabbit. I pulled them away. His little heart must have been going a mile a minute (so was mine!) That rabbit just keeled over and died of fear. That's kind of how I am.

For the last ten days, I haven't eaten well, I haven't slept well, I have stomach pains and I don't want to talk to anybody. People think I'm fine because I hide it when I do socialize. Plus, I know this isn't going to kill me. I know people have worse problems. It's still hard on my body though. So I've been doing what I can, which is calling Horton, and waiting. Horton said she would suspend the sale, but it took seven painful days before it actually happened. These seven days were the nightmare days for me and my daughter.

Today I got the good news. Horton told me that the sale has successfully been put on hold! She promised that she will not let my home go to auction until we have a modification in place or the matter is resolved another way (like maybe an in-house capitalization modification). She also promised to put this in writing to me today (I'm only a little concerned that she did not send me the email yet.)

So, I called the OneWest main call center and they confirmed that the sale of my home has been put on hold indefinitely. There is currently no sale date for my home to go to auction!!! I feel like a ten-ton weight has been lifted off of me. My lawyer and I already had Plan B ready to set in motion. I'm very hopeful that this mess will not result in the initiation of Plan B!

I am trying to maintain my joy. However, a man drove up to my house today (after I got the good news) and looked in my window! He said he was from a real estate company and he was checking to see if anybody lived here. He was scoping out the house to buy it!!! This just literally made me sick to my stomach. What gives him the right to trespass onto my property? We still own this home! Not two hours later, another lady came snooping around. I told the man that our home is no longer set to be auctioned. He said that I better be careful because the banks lie to people! Is he trying to make me keel over and die of fear???

I can't tell you how horrible this is to live through. I would not wish this on anyone. I saw a movie once called The House of Sand and Fog. It's about a woman who loses her home and the man who buys it at auction. A bitter battle over the house ensues. In the end, people die over the house. It's crazy, I thought it was crazy. Now I totally relate!!

I am still Spartacus. I will fight for this house to the bitter end. I'm not fighting over an investment. I'm fighting for my home. I'm fighting for my kids, for my daughter's security. Look at her:


The question isn't what I would do for her; the question is what I wouldn't do for her! There is nothing I wouldn't do for her (or my beautiful boys!). Her tears move mountains inside me. By the way, you might wonder why I'm doing all the "fighting". My job is to deal with the paperwork and my husband's job is to bring in the money. Without the money, the paperwork means nothing (and vice versa). We are a fantastic team! The dynamic duo! He's beside me every step of the way.

Anyway, I am choosing to believe and trust Horton. After all, she is the one who contacted me! She is the one who promised me that my house won't be auctioned. She has been very kind to me on the phone. She has apologized for how long things are taking. She has promised to see this thing through with me and she seems confident that we will reach a resolution.

The happy news is that my husband has plenty of work now. We want to pay the bank back every cent we owe them, and I told Horton this. We aren't asking for a handout. We are just asking for the opportunity to pay them back in full! I never thought it would be so hard to get the bank to take our money. I don't know why they aren't in a bigger rush. I never expected this!

All I know is that this isn't a doll house. This is real life. I think it's interesting how real life shows up in child's play though. I guess that's why they have "play therapy". I wonder how many kids across America are acting out home foreclosures, job losses, unemployment and other issues related to the Recession in their imaginary play?

Playing house might look a lot different these days. "I'm the mommy and I'm cutting coupons. You be the daddy. You sit on the sofa because you don't have a job. You guys be the kids. You all sleep in one room. Let's pretend we're packing!"

I wish this were a game!

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